LIFESTYLE : We need to talk about what happened.....
I hope that Monday has been kind, I for one have actually had a tame day.
But I want to talk about something that happened yesterday it might not seem a massive issue to the majority of you, but I hope that some of you know where I am coming from.
As you may already know, I tend to write personal posts every now and again, because it helps me to make clear of situations that I have had to deal with. This helps alot with my anxiety as if I sit on things, they tend to build up.
Sorry if you wanted a fun post or a beauty post tonight haha .
For those of you that do not know me well, I became a vegetarian in June .... June 5th to be exact... without going back into detail, this was not due to a political reason, but due to the fact that I didn't enjoy meat.
Fast forward to yesterday and I decided to treat Luke to a McDonalds Breakfast as he worked 6 days last week, with the final shift being 12 hours.
I normally order my food without meat and there is no problem.
I ordered a breakfast wrap and when I checked it first, it appeared to be my order.
Sadly for me there was a bit of bacon hidden under the cheese, so I didn't see it until I bit into the meat.
As soon as I tasted it, my reaction was to spit it out.
I was panicked for a minute when I thought that there was a chance that I had consumed meat.
Lucky for me I didn't.
I would like to say that before I go any further, the point of this post is to explore my feelings and not to bad mouth the store that gave me the food ( they were great when I took it back).
What I found weird is the reaction that I had straight after, I felt really close to tears.
This shocked me a little for a few reasons:
1) As I was on the start of this change, I had questioned as to why I was doing it - especially when I was having meat cravings. Now I knew that it was because I genuinely believed in it, not because I was just doing it ....
2) I never knew that I cared so much - I knew that part of this change was driven by a love of animals, but never enough that it would make me want to cry.
3) I have no idea why, but I felt the need to say sorry to Luke alot. I felt that I had let him down by being upset. Lucky he told me to calm and it was ok to feel angry, as it was not my choice to have that type of food.
The main point to take away is that, had this not have happened, I wouldn't have come to the realisation that I truly am a vegetarian because I believe in the reasons behind it. It wouldn't have given me that validation.
All I know is that, in that moment, I have never felt that sick in my life.
What was great, was Luke's reaction.
I never knew he supported me so much in this decision.... because at the start he was rather suspcious that I was just doing it as a vad.
I thought that I would share this with all of you.
Part of having this blog and making changes is great because you can see the ups and downs and the challenges they present.
It also kinda provides me with a tool to look back on.... like a diary I guess.
Let me know, if you have been through things like this and how you dealt with it.
Thats it for now and I will see you tomorrow
Snapchat : Beckydoodah