Lets take a look back a year......

Hi guys, 

So today has been a productive day.... but not in the way that one would expect. Basically, I have succeeded in relaxing.... I have had the best Lush filled bath, complete with Superdrug face mask and hair mask and I have worked towards one of my monthly gaming goals....

I am now half way through my gym quest on Pokemon Alpha Sapphire.... if you are wondering what the heck I am talking about.... check out this blog post and all will become clear. 

We are now settled and watching the only film that has terrified me in my lifetime.... Alien..... That being said I would love a pet Xenomorph.... but I know the pitfalls of owning such a creature haha. 

Anyhow.... A new video went live on the Main Channel today.... 

I thought that I would write about it on here, rather than just mention it because it bought up a few feelings and thoughts that intrigued me....

In the video you see me take a look back a year.... I review a video from last year called As I turn 24.... I thought this video was just a simple birthday and goal video. 

I haven't watched it since I filmed it and before I go any further you can see this video below : 

As I watched it (live on camera) , I realised that when I filmed it, I had alot on my mind.

 I start talking about depression and I seem to be really reflective. It chocked me up a bit, something that I tried to hide in the new video. 

But I realised that last year, I really wasn't happy : I had a car that always broke, I lived in a flat that was always broken , Luke and I were fighting and I tried really hard to make everything look easy.  

This year, I can honestly say that the struggle was worth it. But it's hard to see yourself in pain... even silent pain.  Life would be so much easier if you could just send a message to the past. 

Also Iin the video, I talk about my yearly goals, which I have already shared on here. 

Let me know what you think and I'll see you tomorrow! 



Snapchat : Beckydoodah


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